What You Can't Have
by Aamuu
Summary: One day Simon would finally not act a fool around Carli and she'd fall in love with him, dump Tom and they'd finally be together. Perfect. But then it left him with Jay... ONESHOT. Simon and Jay. The Inbetweeners.


_Listened to: I'm Yours by Jason Mraz._

Ahah.. I'm not very proud of this one, I think I rushed it at the end. Just a quick idea that came into my head and the rest followed spontaniously. In case anyone doesn't know, it's about Jay and Simon from the British comedy _The Inbetweeners._ I personally don't think Simon is gay or has any love interest towards Jay at all, but I thought it was a fun idea so I felt like writing it |D and I'm sorry if it's too OOC, I tried...

and I own nothing.

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Simon never really took much interest in Jay. He was always the asshole of the group, the one he and Will shared a slightly low opinion of, the one who always put himself on top, the one who constantly lied about everything. About sex, about girls... everything that came out of Jay's mouth was pretty much a lie. But despite all of this, Simon still found himself gazing at Jay day after day, falling deeper for him each time.

"'The fuck are you doing?" Jay glared, throwing his arms out, palms facing upwards. Simon quickly masked his embarrassed face by instantly frowning. He never was very good at being discreet.

"What are you on about?" he sighed.

Jay snorted. "Because you looked really fucking gay, that's why."

Simon blinked in surprise. Did he really give off the impression he was gay? He couldn't be gay, he just couldn't. He was in love with Carli. _Carli_. The girl who he'd been friends with for most of his childhood and claimed to be in love with her. Hell, he _was_ in love with her. He even spray painted it on the pavement in massive letters so everyone within a mile could see (much to his dismay). So there was no way he could have an interest in Jay. He was obsessed with sex, rude about others' opinions, rude in general and usually thought he was the one always in the right. What's more, Jay was straight. _Too_ straight in fact. He'd never go for a guy, let alone Simon. He was way too out of his league. But Simon was straight too. Carli was his love interest, the one for him. And one day Simon would finally not act a fool around Carli and she'd fall in love with him, dump Tom and they'd finally be together. Perfect. But then it left him with Jay...

"Bloody hell, Si."

Simon jumped quickly looking around. The common room was deserted apart from him and Jay. Since when did everyone leave? Did he pass out? Was he so lost in his thoughts that he forgot all about everything that was going on? More importantly, did he say anything stupid...

"Oi, Si." Jay leaned forward clicking his fingers in front of Simon's face. Simon looked back at Jay, quickly leaning backwards, blinking rapidly. Jay was now slouched into the sofa, one arm over the strap of his school bag, the other resting on the back of the sofa with his usual bored expression. Simon looked down, shifting uncomfortably, trying his hardest not to make eye contact. His eyes caught on his scruffy trainers. Jay sure had some nice trainers...

"As I was saying..." Jay's voice made Simon's head jerk up to look at him. Jay smirked, raising an eyebrow before continuing. "What's _up_ with you? You've been acting really fucking weird recently and Will's shitting himself over it."

Simon shrugged. "It's nothing, Jay... why do you care anyway?"

Jay paused for a second, his gaze quickly shifting to the door before frowning back at him. "I don't. Where the hell did you get that idea from?"

Simon shook his head, concentrating again on Jay's shoes again. He definately didn't return the interest he had for him. Only friendship. And it hurt. It hurt even more than it hurt whenever Carli rejected him... but then Carli knew his feelings, unlike Jay. He couldn't bear to think what Jay would say if he found out. He'd probably hate him or get scared and avoid him. And maybe Neil and Will would ignore him too. Simon bit his lip; what if the whole school were to find out? Everyone had to be or act straight or they'd be the laughing stock of the school. And it would push what little status they had down even further than it was before. But he could deal with that, all of the humilation, he could deal with. However if Will, Neil and especially _Jay_ would abandon him; where would that leave him?

Jay sat there watching his face, his fingers tapping gently on the back of the sofa. He wasn't going to get anywhere with him, not in a long shot. He sat there in quiet annoyance before getting up and going over to the door, looking back at Simon who had kept to his previous position. He sighed, rolling his eyes before walking out, cursing under his breath. Simon said nothing as he felt his head fall into his hands. Everything felt worse now Jay wasn't with him.


End file.
